Today I tackle the question, “What do I do when I encounter obstacles to success?” This question again prompted thoughts of skipping to the next question on the list although this time I considered the act due to this question’s similarity to the previous question on resilience. Instead, I will plunge ahead and attempt to craft a response.
I struggle, additionally, with the concept of success. I have a hard time defining it for myself as well as even considering it something I desire. I suppose that on the outside, success might look like completing goals that earn widespread external approbation. Sometimes I think I want that, awards and accolades from others. The thoughts flit across my mind but I quickly bat them away. I want those recognitions but not so much that it becomes my all-consuming focus. If I think of success as doing my best or meeting certain goals either self-made or imposed. Then, I think I can relate.
Next, I have to consider potential obstacles. Specific, nuanced obstacles will arise and if I should take the time to consider each one individually, I would engage in an exercise in futility. Instead, I will discuss them in generalities. Some of these obstacles come in the form of procrastination. Even with a meticulous to do list, I will avoid starting projects that take more than a minute or few to complete even though I put those tasks on the list for the specific purpose of getting myself started. The other primary obstacle ties to the to do list, my forgetfulness. I mentioned recently how my brain felt completely stuffed and I forgot the important detail of calling the natural gas company to prevent heat being shut off. Thus, I add just about everything I can think of to my to do list yet I still forget.
So now, I come to the question itself. What do I do when an obstacle like my fickle memory gets in the way of success? What do I do when my distraction prevents me from completing what the professor requested that we prepare in advance of class two weeks ago? In that instance, I felt horrible, confused at first but then guilty, ashamed that I had not done what my professor requested. I then tried to defend myself to ease my guilt as I briefly conversed with a couple of my classmates. I have long known of my defensiveness and the problems it creates. As I frame my reflection in the this way, obstacles to success, I can see how this defensiveness contributes nothing and can stand in the way of success as it sucks away my time and attention.
Procrastination also sabotages future success but in a different way. Simply put, when I put off starting larger projects or tasks, I waste time, leaving an inadequate amount to successfully complete the task. Every time this happens – and it happens far too frequently – I engage in various intensities of mental self-flagellation while I rush through the work still ahead creating a substandard product, losing sleep, and occasionally both. Obviously, procrastination stands in the way of success.
Writing about the topic like this makes it seem like I never have success. Often I do though, days when I dive into a project right away and love the product I create. Other times, I welcome criticism instead of defensively blocking it out, and have incredible aha! moments which affect my work going forward. In the end, I hope this reflection will help me identify flaws on which I can improve, with God’s help and thus move me closer to where He wants me to go.